For the moment

I’m feeling like I can’t be bothered with anyone anymore. To the point that I’m telling myself I should just give up any kind of effort with friends and acquaintances I keep in touch. Do I even have friends? I don’t feel like I can talk to anyone, or It’s like I’m getting in their way if I do. I can’t rely on any of them and this is all feelings, but I know for a fact they don’t make any effort on their side with me.  And what’s the point of trying to get attention they don’t want to give in the first place?  You’ve already learnt before it’s nearly always one sided.

So I tell myself once again, not to bother. Cry a bit. Get over the self doubts. And remember not to bother with anyone, but keep doing what you have to do. Keep achieving your goals and don’t let some pointless feeling of loneliness get in the way. You’ve been alone most of the time anyway.  So you don’t have a list of people you can whine and whinge to. Cry and get over it tonight and conquer the world tomorrow.